


Return of the Thundercloud or Calamity Strikes Back

by lilysmiles



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Angeal Hewley is So Done with this Shit, Confused Cloud Strife, Creature Harry Potter, Gen, Hojo is a Warning, Human Experimentation, Little Duckling Sephiroth, M/M, Magically Powerful Harry Potter, Morally Grey Harry Potter, Multi, Pyromaniac Genesis Rhapsodos, Questionable Science Practices, Reincarnation, Rufus Knows Everything, Self-Insert, Time Travel, but he doesn't, or at least tries to
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:40:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 16,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27683021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilysmiles/pseuds/lilysmiles
Summary: When Cloud went back to where it all began to fix all that went wrong he realized that there was more to his mission than he ever signed up for.And he doesn’t even get payed for this shit!
Comments: 43
Kudos: 201





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired by like a bunch of other fics so if you see similar moments, that's why.

Prologue

Harry

He didn’t know what he was doing anymore.

The bright-eyed, naïve teenager he once was has been long gone. He died somewhere along the way and the man once known as Harry James Potter didn’t even notice. In his place was a jaded being tired of his monotone existence.

Turns out all those cliché phrases about boredom being the bane of immortals was true.

Figures.

One thing he didn’t volunteer for was experiencing it for himself.

It’s ironic how seemingly insignificant pieces of a puzzle could influence so much. But for all that he was bored to tears, he would never change his choices that got him here. Never.

When the war with Voldemort was over, he was hailed as a hero. A champion. But for some bizarre reason the public had these strange opinions that just because he followed his ‘destiny’ this made him and his life public property. That he would become an Auror, marry Ginny Weasley and pop out a bunch of babies that would be named after his parents and his ‘beloved’ mentor. Yeah, right….

Lets just say that when he made his opinion known and decided to enjoy his newfound freedom, the Weasleys, his so called ‘family’ wasn’t happy.

But he didn’t give them a chance to act. After dropping that bombshell in a very public setting to avoid any misunderstandings he packed his bags, took his gold and vanished into the night.

Harry James Potter was no more.

No matter how much the British Wizarding World sought their savior and scapegoat they could not find him. Ever.

In the end it was better that way.

He took his lovely time to travel the world. The Magical and then the Muggle. He learned a great many things. Some which were even mainstream but considered the height of magical development in wizarding Britain. Turns out ‘foolish wand-waving’ was truly foolish. A wand was a foci simplifying the conduction of extremely difficult magical practices, but even then a staff or a gemstone is preferred over a wand.

Teaching children that using a wand is the only thing that makes magic possible unless the individual is beyond powerful just stunts their belief and magical development. Any school producing wand-wavers severely lacks in fundamentals and powerful graduates.

But considering the policies of Wizarding Britain, the focus on producing sheeple is understandable.

Turns out that the purebloods were right. Magicals really were special.

Being living and breathing Avatars of the Lifestream does that to you.

The Lifestream, also known as Mother Magic, the Planet, Life, Death, Fate, Destiny, Gaia and others, is so much more than a Being, an Entity, a Concept, a Representation. And Harry was one of the ‘lucky’ ones chosen as its Champion.

Well…

Potter luck strikes again.

At first it wasn’t noticeable, but Harry didn’t age.

While everyone around him grew and had families, Harry remained the same as he always was.

Young.

Powerful.

Eternal.

No wound could hold him down.

He really was immortal.

At first he was worried. But then he realized that immortality is only a curse if you are surrounded by those you don’t want to lose. The easiest solution was not getting attached in the first place.

And it worked.

A little too well…

He not only grew apart from others, he stopped keeping track of the events that surrounded him. And that was a mistake.

The one event that was dreaded by all Magicals worldwide happened quietly. Some vengeful muggleborn exposed the magical world in a way that could not be covered up. And that was the beginning of the end.

At first there were attempts at negotiations, but the more the muggles found out about the capabilities of magic, the more resentful they became. After all, jealousy is an ugly thing.

What followed were multiple disappearances of Magicals living in the muggle world as well as muggleborn children. But few of the ones in power cared. After all, those missing were just second-class citizens. Mudblood trash.

Squibs weren’t even that.

But the attitude of the purebloods didn’t change the facts. Squibs were children of magic. Crippled and sick but that hardly mattered. Physically they had little to no differences between proper wizards.

That was something that thrilled the scientists, the church, the governments and the many investors. After all, it is so much easier to get a hold of someone who cannot resist over someone who can blow buildings apart from fright. 

The experiments were even deemed a success. After all, crystallizing magic into Materia that could be used by anyone at all seemed to make everything worthwhile. But it wasn’t. For with every Materia created, a magical had to die. The rarer the Materia, the more powerful the magical with rarer gifts. Whereas most muggleborns could only produce simple Magic Materia such as fire and lightning, the squibs and purebloods with ancient bloodline gifts could be sacrificed to produce those such as Revive Materia resulting from ancient healer lineages, or the Chakra Materia resulting from the Asian bloodlines.

But nothing in this life is free.

And everyone is wise in foresight.

And those in power should have remembered that.

The first warning bell came in the form of monsters.

Abominations.

They were first mistaken for magical creatures. Perhaps that was what some of them once were. But no longer.

Now they were just powerful, ravenous beasts with a taste for human flesh.

But while the Magicals could interpret the warning signs, the muggles did not.

After all it is so much easier to blame the children of magic. Those who are different. Who cares that the appearance of such creatures signifies the discontent of the Lifestream? That the next step would be the appearance of Weapons and a Cleansing?

No one.

But that was just the beginning.

For the muggles dared to bite off more than they could chew.

After all, just because one is a squib, doesn’t mean they are defenseless. Especially when it is one of those families. The ones whose names are spoken in hushed whispers, those whose deeds have been forgotten with the flow of time.

But just because others prefer to forget, doesn’t mean that THEY do not remember.

And that was how a mere squib from an ancient family with no surviving magic users unleashed a demon upon the world.

Released the Calamity.

After all, one doesn’t need to have active magical powers for some magical practices.

Demonology just happens to be one of those.

And becoming a Black Materia upon her death?

That was a price she was more than willing to pay.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1

Harry

Harry Potter or Hadrian as he preferred to go by these days, was annoyed.

Mind you, not with the quite literal end of the world happening out there somewhere. No, he was annoyed with Binns, Hogwarts, Dumbledore, the wizarding world and the low level of education everywhere. Especially history. And himself.

After all history does tend to repeat itself.

But who cared about that when Binns’ history class was such a wonderful opportunity to get some extra sleep?

Why does the wizarding world pretend that anything before the Statute of secrecy that ever happened where the Goblin Wars?

And the sources that state otherwise are either destroyed, kept in private collections of wealthy purebloods or written in some obscure language that hadn’t been used in thousands of years?

But while he did attempt to broaden his magical education, history always remained that daunting old tome on the shelf that was better off used as a door wedge (direct citation of a physics professor that was annoyed at students repeatedly setting off the fire alarm by using a fire extinguisher for that very purpose).

History in the wizarding world after the introduction of the Statute became something of a running joke. Instead of shining and showing off to the mundane population the magicals were left to stew among themselves. Where before participating in muggle wars was a point of prestige and being able to cast curses of Pestilence and Fiendfire was a sign of great power and social standing (after all what king or lord would hire a no-name mage?). Afterwards, it became a sign of a Dark wizard, of one that doesn’t follow the Statute of Secrecy, that is a liability unable to keep the secret from the muggles, that belongs in Azkaban.

Where before being chosen as a mate of a humanoid magical creature was the greatest honor, nowadays it was a stain on one’s reputation and bloodline. Where once High Elves, the Sidhe and Vampires were true children of magic, they became something lesser. Something other than human. An abomination. And so they left. And took their magic with them to worlds more hospitable than our own.

Why would the wizarding world want or need reminders that they had become weak? That their ancestors were most likely rolling in their graves at seeing them? That the Celtic Druids were avid fans of human sacrifices? Especially those of the Roman invaders? That the so-called ‘Light’ wizard Merlin was a monster (perhaps literally considering the muggle myths of him being a cambion) that ordered the slaughter of thousands of babes upon the words of a prophecy to obtain his goals? That Dracula was an actual real thing beyond muggle fiction and a historical figure? That the Oracles of Ancient Greece and Rome had powers far beyond the pathetic attempts at foresight made by a drunken Trelawney and her peers? That the Ancient Egyptian Necromancers cast curses that could last eons? That the Ritualists of the Aztecs and Mayan civilizations could control seasons at the price of sacrifice? That the Ancient Slavic sorcerers could not just see but travel between the times? That the Demonologists of Ancient Sumer could control demons the weakest of which could raze cities to the ground? That the secrets of the Lost City of Atlantis remain a mystery to this day?

But who needed that knowledge?

No one.

Who wanted to remember the old glory of magical empires that disappeared leaving behind only megaliths?

And now there is an Archdemon on the loose and no Demonologists.

That’s what you get when you ban everything remotely powerful and prosecute any wielders.

They made their bed.

They can now lay in it.

Even renaming themselves into CETRA and uniting to fight both the muggles and the Calamity simultaneously would only prolong their demise.

But that was no concern of Harry’s.

After all he had different priorities.

Being dubbed a Savior ( _again_ ) and kicked out to the front lines for the second time is something so Gryffindorish, his Slytherin side starts spitting venom at the bare hint of ‘helping’ the magicals.

He had done his part.

What happens next is not his problem.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2

Harry

For once, Hadrian was actually one of the rare few that knew exactly what was going on. And why nothing could really be done about it.

After all, it wasn’t just one Archdemon that was summoned, but two. And worse, they came in the flesh.

When a demon is summoned, a gate of a sorts must be opened. The more powerful the demon, the wider the gate needed. For this very reason powerful demon ‘summonings’ were nothing more than an Avatar, an image of a sorts with a part of the consciousness and power of the targeted demon. Its power and ability was only what could fit through the gate. For this reason it is only possible to summon an imp or a succubus in the flesh, and even then sacrifices and magical power of the summoner are vital.

Despite the common belief, one thing that Squib certainly _did not do_ was _SUMMON_ the demon. In order to actually successfully summon an Archdemon, thousands if not _millions_ of sacrifices must be made. The ritual must be completed by a circle of mages of magical power that was unseen today. What she actually did was break the Seal. Thus, the creature that had been trapped for eons had been released. And it was hungry.

Ironically, only Avatars could be exorcised. While low-level demons CAN BE killed, with powerful demons that is not the case. The only way for such creatures to be destroyed is to be consumed by another demon.

And that was a problem.

The names and origins had been long forgotten, but many millennia ago the Earth was home to multiple advanced magical civilizations. And there were wars.

No one was really surprised by the Battle Mages, Necromancers, or Elementals upon the battlefield, but just like the nukes of today, there were weapons that existed to never actually be used. The Summons.

It is unknown whether the rulers of two countries simultaneously smoked some weed or they were just that crazy, or desperate but one thing led to another and the summons that remained locked away in secret saw the daylight. And they were used.

The first thing the two beings did was devour all the summoners. Ironically, they were the only ones that could potentially contain and banish them. But they couldn’t. The demons were just too powerful. Now they were free.

Luckily, for humanity the demons had a mutual loathing at first sight and decided to first fight among themselves. That was pure dumb luck. At least they didn’t decide to breed to release armies of their demonic offspring upon the world. And so two became one in the worst way possible, the victor consumed the loser and began to devour all in its path. A once flourishing world was on its way to become a Demonic Domain.

The magicals, while being much more powerful than those existing today could do little. They had no way to banish the demon, no way to kill it…

The only possible solution was sealing it away and hoping that in the future their descendants would grow more knowledgeable and powerful to be able to annihilate the captive creature. For that purpose, thousands of mages willingly sacrificed themselves to create the Seal. And one of the only remaining powerful magicals was left to be its Keeper and to pass on their knowledge to future generations.

But all their hopes were for naught.

With the deaths of so many powerful and knowledgeable magicals that had once made up the majority of the population, those who didn’t have any power previously took the reigns. And the vast knowledge of the ancient magics began to fade as its users became weaker with every generation.

And now the most recent descendants had the audacity of collectively sticking their heads in the sand, pushing the last Keeper to break the seal.

Honestly, Hadrian thought that they deserved everything that was coming for them.

But perhaps he should have asked the Planet.

Turns out it was of an entirely different opinion.

Oops…

What can I say? At least _now_ I am definitely not bored.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 3

Harry

Waking up as a newborn baby was a surprise.

Getting an adorable twin brother was a pleasant surprise.

Getting a nut-job of a scientist proclaim himself their father, not so much.

Being dubbed Adrammelech was just plain weird.

Even Sephiroth was better! 

Could he swap?

After all, babies are all the same. Being twins would just make the exchange easier.

Yeah…

Metallic name tags on ankles and microchips to the back of their necks say that isn’t gonna happen.

Well, got to make the most of the hand you are dealt with. Sticking with Adrian thank-you very much! Almost sounds the same as Hadrian anyways…

He just has one question, WHAT AM I DOING HERE?!

…

And for some reason Gaia just decides to play possum! Could she chose any other time?

Growing up in the labs is terrible.

Dursleys, whatever I said about you I am very, very sorry. Compared to this guy you deserve the ‘Guardian of the Year’ award. Just kidding. Hope you rot in the Hell you so persistently believed in…

After a year in this place I am completely on-board with Riddle’s point of view. ‘Lets kill all the muggles’ is a brilliant election campaign. If we start world domination/destruction with Hojo and his lab I would personally do the chicken dance and even be your Bella…

The only thing that makes up for it is my new ‘little’ brother. I swear he is as cute as a button. I still have my magic so none of the surveillance or the security does a thing if I want to be discrete. Stealing a camera and taking as many adorable photos as possible was great.

Sometimes I feel like I can hear his thoughts and am always in-tune with his feelings. The connection between us is like a constant warm buzz in my mind. It’s a little strange but maybe that is normal among magical twins.

We both have silver hair. At first I was reminded of Malfoy, but even at his best he always looked like a pale rodent whereas we look as if we are touched by moonlight. It’s gorgeous. Unique. Even that stuck-up Fleur would be jealous.

Our eyes initially worried me. While the beautiful Avada-green was more than a little familiar, split pupils were rare even in the wizarding world. But contrary to popular belief it wasn’t just Voldemort who had them. Or evil, dark wizards. In magical India having split pupils and the gift of Parseltongue was a sign of prestige. Their culture still recognised the descendants of the Naga as higher beings and children of magic.

When my twin took to babbling in Parseltongue like a fish to water I let my worries rest. After all, some Naga heritage is hardly something to worry about. And we now had our very own secret language that no matter how hard he tried the Professor couldn’t decipher. Internally I sarcastically wished him luck. He would have better chances at understanding _actual_ snakes over us after all.

But the more we grew the more I concerned.

Human interaction was something we severely lacked. For all that we were prodded for never-ending tests, for all that we were trained until we reached our limit, we lacked the comfort of human touch and socialisation. Any staff member that showed us kindness tended to disappear. Even the more adequate Professor Gast went missing one day. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t miss him or feel sorry for him. He consciously chose his path. All the consequences were on him. But compared to Hojo the man was a saint.

So I understand why but I was still worried. My brother, my sweet little angel was growing to be a sociopath at best, a psychopath at worst. He loves me. I swear I could get away with murder. But one thing I feel he wouldn’t accept was me leaving him. Never. He would keep me around even if he has to drag me back kicking and screaming. But I was never leaving him. Ever. In my two lives I had never had anyone as precious to me as my twin.

In contrast to his reverence of me, other people were little more than talking furniture to him. Although sometimes I caught him looking at them with a hungry glint in his eyes. A hunter evaluating its prey. But for this new life I think this is normal. After all, sometimes I feel the same way. And while I can control it and so can he, sometimes through our shared connection I can tell just how close to the surface the mutual desire to tear them all apart is. But that is alright. After all, descendants of magical races always had traces of their instincts lingering for many generations…


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 4

Cloud

Cloud can honestly say that he doesn’t understand a thing.

One moment everything was fine. It seemed like all the hardships were a thing of the past. They were slowly rebuilding. Sephiroth finally stopped making his ‘lovely’ appearance. Perhaps the guy had finally looked up the meaning of _NOT INTERESTED_ in a dictionary…

(Who are you kidding Cloud? As if you don’t dream of that silver hair every second night? At least you aren’t sleeping with Tifa, regardless of all of her attempts. Trying to pass off _THOSE_ dreams as nightmares would have been a hard sell.)

_Yeah Cloud._

Lie to others. Lie to them well. Wouldn’t be the first time, wouldn’t be the last. But whatever you do, do not lie to yourself. Don’t pretend that somewhere deep inside, you don’t get the feeling of anticipation before every fight with him. That you don’t want him to come back. That you cry into your pillow because you are HAPPY. That with every day when he isn’t there you don’t feel more dead inside.

Maybe it’s the Jenova cells. After all that buzzing awareness, that tingling connection is anything but natural. But for all that Hojo ran around with his Reunion theory, it cannot be right. Or completely right. Cloud can’t help but feel that there is much more to it than that.

And he is right.

He knows it.

He has to be.

But now it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters. For he is back at Nibelheim and he is back to being a child. Again.

He always knew that he was missing a lot of pieces of his life. It was more that he tried to pretend that he wasn’t. Fill the void with something meaningful. Normal. And that’s how his delusions formed. The human mind is a weak thing, give it some empty spaces and some input from well-meaning people and it begins to form inflatable castles. At first glance they may delude, but only at first, after all for all that they are convincing, for all they are pretty they are really only filled with air on the inside. Apply some pressure and nothing will remain but shattered hopes and empty air.

It’s time to face reality Cloud.

Time to wake up.

And he did.

Little Cloud was once again beaten for his attempt to save Tifa during her disastrous trip to the mountains. But the Cloud that fell to the rocky ground wasn’t the once who stood back up. Wasn’t the one beat the bullies to a pulp and walked away without a backward glance.

From that moment on, Little Cloud was a different person. Because little Cloud? He wasn’t so Little anymore. At least mentally…

Cloud could genuinely say that he now hated Nibelheim. Or remembered that he always had. Somewhere deep inside he was even grateful to Sephiroth for burning the miserable place down. All of them deserved it.

Except his Ma that is.

He loved his Ma.

Even when he couldn’t recall her face or voice or even her name, Claudia Strife always had a special place in his heart.

He never quite understood why she stayed. Why she tolerated the poor treatment of the nobodies in a backwater town. She was a great mechanic. She could have moved anywhere. Rocket Town or Cosmo Canyon, hell even Gongaga would have been a million times better than _Nibelheim_. But she stayed. Even when he left for Midgard she chose to stay. And he still doesn’t understand why.

But then there was always something different about Claudia Strife.

And now there is something different about Cloud.

After all, the Strife’s are a strange lot.

“Don’t pay them too much attention.”

“Their strangeness is completely normal.”

“Look away.”

“Play with the other children.”

“Oh it’s That Woman. The only one in the whole town that has a child unmarried.”

“Don’t talk to her.”

“To them.”

“They are nobodies Tifa.”

“Oh they are weird?”

“Their weirdness is completely normal.”

And so no one noticed.

Why should anyone notice a thing? After all Cloud Strife is just like his good for nothing mother.

And when Little _HUMAN_ Cloud Strife fell down and Little _NON HUMAN_ Cloud got up no one noticed a thing.

For everything is as it should be.

They are just the only weirdos in the perfectly ordinary town of Nibelheim after all.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 5

Cloud

It’s official.

Tifa is/was a two-faced b… liar.

_“Oh Cloud, back in Nibelheim we were the best of friends!”_

_“We even went together on a trip to the mountains!”_

_“But it was a big secret you know…”_

_“After all, father was the Mayor. He was sooo overprotective. Especially about boys.”_

_“We were even secretly dating!”_

_“When you left for Midgard, you promised that you will come back for me!”_

_“You were such a romantic Cloud!”_

_“I was waiting for you!”_

_“I know you have problems, I know you don’t remember, but I am never giving up on our love!”_

_“Cloud, the bar only has two bedrooms. One is for the kids, the other for us, do you like it?”_

Call it luck, but for all her attempts, their so-called ‘relationship’ never went beyond first base. Cloud always felt as if something was off, something was missing. Something wasn’t right. At the time he thought that the issue stemmed from his unresolved feelings towards… never mind…but now he knows the truth. After all, how could something not be missing if it was never there in the first place?

And now he can finally see with his eyes open, have all the facts on hand…

Their so-called love was just a figment of Tifa’s devious imagination.

And perhaps he should have anticipated it, but betrayal is a feeling that actually hurts.

It is a painful thing.

Surprising that with his lifestyle, he hadn’t experienced it sooner. That no one had plunged the metaphorical knife into his back. But now he knows what to expect. He will be careful. Even with the people that previously made up his team. They may have followed him, had common goals once upon a time, but that doesn’t mean that there is anything that could unite them now or that they never had their own agendas in the first place.

Although he can understand why she did what she did, he will never forgive or forget. Even though THIS Tifa is ‘innocent’ he will never let her into his heart again.

One thing was certain, Tifa wasn’t his friend. She MAY have been an innocent crush of Little Cloud, but even then she had no right to play with words. For Little Cloud was always alone.

Always.

This Cloud should have remembered that.

Getting dragged before the Mayor for beating up the bullies should have been something he anticipated, but he was so preoccupied with his new circumstances that he let the entire incident slip from his mind.

“That boy! That delinquent! He was always a trouble maker!”

“Yes! First it’s your daughter Mayor Lockhart! Dragging her to the mountains! She was hurt! She could have died!”

“He chose new victims! He is a monster! A freak! What does he have to say for himself? I say he deserved punishment! Our poor children are all hurt because of him…”

And so it went on and on and on…

No one even let me say a word. Even if they did, I doubt any of them would listen. But then again, whatever ‘punishment’ they come up with I will just ignore. Even if these brats don’t get their lesson the first time, I would just have to repeat. Even if they all avoid me like the plague, I will still have Tifa…

But then my trail of thoughts was interrupted. Someone finally decided to step in as the voice of reason.

Zangan…

I honestly didn’t expect him to step up to defend me.

What can I say, I have been pleasantly surprised…

“But Mayor Lockhart! Look at that little shrimp! He is half the size of the smallest boy and there is seven of them! He couldn’t have beat them up without possessing a skill set he most definitely doesn’t have! I am the only martial arts master here and I have never taught him and never will! It is far more likely that the boys had a fight amongst themselves and don’t want to own up!”

Oh thanks Master Zangan! So good to know you have such a ‘high’ opinion of me. But at least he is logical. Hopefully the entire thing will now be resolved with no issue.

But then came the blow I had never expected…

“But Father! I saw! It was Cloud! He did it! It’s just like the mountains! It’s all his fault!...”

And so the chains of lies that formed a non-existent ‘love’ and friendship shattered. I can honestly say that I remember very little of the meeting after that and that I had never shown up to my ‘punishment’. Oh they were so pissed…

I still can’t believe that I had even trusted someone like her. Next time I will put more trust in my instincts.

While I can complete the puzzle of the reasons behind her actions, she is now a thing of the past.

When a spoilt little girl who didn’t know a single hardship, lost her life of privilege in an instant. When she had spent years trying and failing to return to her standards of living. Finding a golden ticket in the form of an amnesiac acquaintance that seemed to be a SOLDIER and then became a Hero with a stable courier business was her chance. After all, how hard can it be to woo him with tales of a non-existent romance and friendship into a marriage?

But her plans made little difference now.

Because from this moment on, Tifa Lockhart is dead to me.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 6

Sephiroth

Sephiroth always knew he was different.

It was more than just the unexplainable powers that his little twin had taught him in secret. More than his abnormal physical strength. More than the strange instincts and urges that he later understood didn’t seem to influence any of the Shinra staff.

With his superior senses, he always knew just WHAT they all thought of him.

…Monster, creature, thing, experiment, specimen, success…

From the youngest age, he realized that asking the adults questions earned him nothing but more pain, and if any of the assistants were in any way ‘nice’ then they were either instructed to be so, wanted something from him, from _them_ or would most likely disappear in the near future.

If they were meant to know _it_ , they would be taught and trained until they couldn’t move anymore. Until the material could be recited in their sleep. Until they bled.

But if they weren’t meant to know, or think of something…

Well that was an entirely different problem.

But he was lucky.

He had a twin.

Adrian.

Adrian was always there for him. He knew so much! And always answered his questions. And was never, _ever_ caught.

When Adrian wanted to leave, the door would slide open on its own. All the surveillance equipment would run in cycles. All the staff would turn blind and momentarily turn deaf…

Adrian could do things. Weird things, strange things, unexplainable things. It was like… No, it _was_ magic. It _is_ magic!

And now Sephiroth could do them too.

But he had one fear.

Something he couldn’t fight.

What if his twin, his other half was taken away?

It had happened before.

When they were very little.

The Professor was against ‘Unnecessary emotional attachments’.

But their separation didn’t last.

Later they heard the hushed whispers. Strange words…

…Reunion, unstable, separation not advised…

Apparently, they threw quite the light-show. To maintain a stable working environment and reduce the losses of the Science Department budget further separation was unadvised. But even that one single day that they had to spend apart was the worst in their entire lives.

Later they had learnt that Hojo was quite baffled.

He could have anticipated such an effect in identical twins. After all they were once a single organism and would be more naturally inclined towards Reunion. He thought that with fraternal twins, if one hadn’t consumed the other in the womb, than they could be separated.

But he was very wrong.

In both his theory and his reasoning.

It was all their choice.

They would never separate again.

Just because something inside of them whispers and tempts to become one doesn’t mean that it is even going to happen.

Never. _Ever_.

And while consuming his twin would mean that they would be together forever, such an outcome was unacceptable. After all that would mean that his Adrian would be gone. Forever. Along with the hugs, the stories, the kisses. He would be alone.

_All alone._

And that’s _never_ going to happen.

The one good thing that came out of their temporary separation was finally being allowed to share a room. (Not that they didn’t _before_ , as _if_ some locks could stop them). But now they were officially roommates with no need to sneak around.

And the Professor was quite satisfied with the outcome.

After all it isn’t an emotional attachment but Reunion. It only means that his theory is correct. Everything he does is for science in the end.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 7

Harry

SOLDIER was hell.

It was worse that the labs.

Worse than the Dursleys.

I swear had we actually had the physical strength that our age suggests we would have been beaten up and raped many, many times over. With our looks it’s kind of an obvious outcome.

The runts of the litter get ‘special’ treatment after all.

Being twelve in SOLDIER when the youngest CANDIDATES have to be at least fourteen is bad enough. Being faster, stronger, smarter, more talented and just more… Well no one has ever liked prodigies in actual, real life.

At least we have each other.

After the first unfortunate ‘accident’ to befall on our excessively touchy-feely roommates, we got our own room.

With the Professor pulling strings, it was simple enough.

Had we actually been caught we would have been punished, but that is the thing, even with everyone KNOWING it was us they could never, ever, ever prove ANYTHING.

Hojo knows the silent rules of conduct well enough.

We bend but we don’t break. We always offer a warning. An ‘accident’.

And those who don’t heed it...

Well…

The Science Department has never had a shortage of body bags.

I even think he is somewhat proud with the way we deal with problems. After all, he basically uses the same tactics.

But while his secrets have secrets, we didn’t just spend our time at the labs being experiments. And we made it a point to find out each and every single one.

The embezzling of company funds was something that no one would be surprised by.

After all, this is Shinra.

Honest and fair people don’t survive here.

The unapproved and inhumane experiments were nothing surprising either.

But the secrets of our own birth turned into something you only see in Brazilian Drama.

The files we originally found were so obviously forged it isn’t funny. What is funny is that Sephiroth actually believed them. For a minute. Or two…

Okay, I really need to work on some problem solving and abstract reasoning with him. A white file with capital red letters ‘TOP SECRET’ is always either a dud or a decoy. Real life isn’t anything like a movie.

Unless your target lives off a single brain cell.

That could happen…

I guess…

But that isn’t about Hojo. He might be the type of crazy that makes Bellatrix Lestrange look like an angel but he is just the more unpredictable for it. And whatever you might say, a stupid person would NEVER become the HEAD of the SCIENCE Department in Shinra.

So yeah…

Turns out there were a great many things we didn’t actually know about him…

The guy is paranoid as f….

Turns out that EVERY SINGLE FILE that has anything to do with our origins is forged bullshit. Even some of the experimental data on us is. I guess it makes sense for him to keep it all in his head. Hackers and spies are everywhere. Big Brother is…the Turks are watching you. So the moment you put ANYTHING online you are guaranteed to have it hacked. Especially on Shinra servers. And while paper files are ironically more secure, they are not foolproof either.

But for all that he wiped as much info about himself as possible, some things could still be found.

His marriage to a fellow scientist by the name Lucrecia Crescent was one of them. A scientist chick that went missing, presumed dead around the time of our birth.

And while he was VERY thorough wiping his files, her hard drives were still intact.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 8

Harry

Lucrecia Crescent was a selfish, vain bitch.

Excuse my language.

While I didn’t let myself get my hopes up, that we could potentially have a mother out there somewhere that may actually want us, Sephiroth was a different story.

While he isn’t one for emotional attachments outside of our twin bond, finding out the truth was still traumatizing. For me as well. Especially if my suspicions are correct.

Apparently, a few decades ago, a suspicious body was found within some excavation site in the Northern Crater. It was miraculously still intact and thereby dubbed Jenova, the last Ancient.

This led to several Scientific projects by Shinra to commercialise this find. The project to create super-soldiers was just the most successful. But the injection of ‘J-cells’ into adults led to irreversible mutations. It was how the experiments on babies were approved.

The reward for the most successful scientist was becoming the Head of the Shinra Science Department.

Hybridization of species has always been an issue that had posed multiple challenges for science. Even when natural offspring was possible, it was most often barren and suffered from the ailments of both species. And even then the two species must be compatible.

As the specimen was presumed quite dead, hybridization the ‘natural’ way wasn’t possible. That was when Lucrecia volunteered to be the surrogate. She wanted to be part of the project even though she was a scientist of a completely different field.

As Hojo wanted to take part in the project beyond just being the brains behind the scenes. He was to use his own genetic material in the procedure. But Lucrecia ruined everything. After many difficulties, a viable sample was obtained and the conception was performed in a laboratory. But Lucrecia thought that for a project to produce super-soldiers Hojo’s genetics were lacking. They didn’t need smart specimens, but powerful ones. She took a different sample and performed the procedure with the genetic material of one of the Turks from the security detail, Vincent, who was her lover at the time. 

After her seeming success, she combined the samples.

Because of the aggressive behavior of the J-cells that had been observed, she was convinced that the more powerful specimen would consume the weaker. She didn’t care which sample would survive, but was convinced that it would be Vincent’s.

But she was wrong.

For instead of one consuming the other, the two samples combined (which is why no one noticed a thing when they were used) and separated again later. Resulting in the birth of fraternal twins with essentially two fathers each.

To say that Hojo was shocked was an understatement. 

He knew that there was one embryo. That there was only meant to be one child. And while the children may be identical twins, he grew suspicious.

And he was right.

For all that Lucrecia was his wife, she was still an ambitious scientist. She was tired of always being in the shadow of her crazy but genius husband. She wanted to be the Science Department Head. And so Hojo had to go. But so did Vincent. As one of them (or so she thought) was the actual father with actual legal rights while she was only a surrogate with few actual legal rights.

So she played the distraught, abused lover, bullied into unethical experiments by her husband in order to revive the Ancients. That she only wanted to run away with him and the baby. And Vincent fell for it.

But Hojo was many things but an idiot was not one of them.

And he was never scared to get his hands dirty, while Vincent was overconfident. After all, what could a mere scientist do to a Turk? There is no way he could lose.

But he did.

And Lucrecia got the boot from the Science Department along with a divorce.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 9

Harry

That day, after we erased the data, we sneaked back to our room.

To say that the information was shocking was an understatement.

At least SHE wasn’t our mother.

But then if my suspicions are correct, our real one is much, much worse.

That night Seph looked into my eyes with his. He looked so alone. So sad…

I couldn’t resist giving him infinite hugs.

“So we are all alone now?” he whispered.

“Now we are never alone. We have never been alone. We always have each other.”

“Why did we even dig into this? We really would have been better off not knowing.” He hung onto me like a little monkey.

“Seph, you have to understand, there are some things out there much more painful than the truth could ever be. At least now if some chick comes up to us and throws a tantrum about how she is our long-lost mother, we would definitely know that she is lying. Whether she is some random woman or Lucrecia matters little.” I tried to be the voice of reason. But this conversation is a difficult one. I keep getting flashbacks to Dumbledore and his method of raising Saviors.

“But when we started this I really hoped that Hojo isn’t our father! I don’t want to be related to him!” 

“Seph, you do realize that it could be way worse. Imagine if our father was Vincent Valentine, as in completely Valentine. At least in this case we get some protection our shared genes offer us and are unlikely to be killed on the laboratory table in the name of science. Hojo’s sentimentality towards the success of his own genetics is completely understandable. As his children he is highly unlikely to inject us with something lethal just to see what happens…”

Seph looked scandalized enough to interrupt.

“But that’s EXACTLY what he does! He injects us with something lethal just to see what happens!”

I couldn’t help but look at him like he was still that sweet little toddler that used to follow me around. Sometimes I tend to forget that he is still mentally a child because of how smart he is. But while ‘innocent’ isn’t a term that can be applied to someone raised in a lab, he is still so naïve in certain aspects.

“Do you really think that if he couldn’t handle the consequences we would even be in the same _room_ as those substances? Or do you think that he hasn’t tested everything on someone else? Someone less valuable?”

Sephi’s eyes were so wide, he resembled a baby owlet.

“But…but…”

“Look at it this way, you are tall, I am short. You LIKE scientific literature while it puts me to sleep. You have higher physical characteristics while I am stronger magically. And we both enjoy sneaking around and arranging ‘accidents’, lethal and otherwise.

So tell me, who has inherited what and from whom?”


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 10

Cloud

At first I was so happy to be back. With Ma. Even with all the bigots in Nibelheim. I didn’t even want to hear about Shinra. That place is the source of endless nightmares that I really don’t want to deal with for as long as possible.

But just because I didn’t want to touch it with a ten foot pole doesn’t mean that Shinra just decided to disappear one day.

That place is quite literally the only place for very, very comfortable employment.

And that drove me up a wall.

But just because everyone was so focused about Shinra doesn’t mean that I didn’t shut out that rubbish to the best of my ability. After all, it’s not like there is a single grain of truth in those gossip rags everyone collects.

Reading about how Scarlet is supposedly pregnant with triplets or quintuplets every second week from simultaneously Palmer and President Shinra is just ridiculous. I have better things to do.

And while subscribing to the Silver Elite would get me much more reliable information, I just can’t force myself. Religiously stalking Sephiroth’s stalkers is not something that would be good for my mental health. (Really, Cloud? What about the first time around? Did you just happen to conveniently _forget_ all those Sephiroth bedroom posters? The Silver Elite membership? Or was there a different Cloud Strife out there that had all those fantasssiiieee…)

MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER RIGHT NOW!

And getting back on track…

I still have to get to Midgard, to Shinra. But there are just too many things that I cannot remember. And while I can simply blow up all the reactors, it wouldn’t solve the problem. Jenova’s body is in some unknown location. And Sephiroth was most definitely not the only one subjected to J-cells.

But I cannot be SOLDIER.

I cannot, _will not_ have a medical.

I can’t feel them.

The J-cells.

But I know they are there. A constant part of me that can never be purged no matter how much Aerith’s holy water I swim in. They will always be there.

I suspect that they are something much more than just cells. If they were a physical characteristic, they would be gone in my younger body. I would not have split pupils.

But I do.

And I am scared.

How am I meant to get rid the world of Jenova’s taint if I can’t even purge myself?


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 11

Harry

Wutai _sucks_.

It’s official.

Have you even seen Naruto? Ever tried to ignore the bright hair, the self-righteous dialogue and the lack of maturity?

Well, that is a great comparison to Wutai.

For all that President Shinra is moronic, greedy scum, we stopped feeling guilty after the first day. After all, being unable to leave camp in groups of less than five and not have your throat slit is a great motivator against pity.

And then there are the bugs, swamps and forests.

DON’T FORGET THOSE DAMNED BUGS!!! (Or the insect repellent)…

And the ninjas.

The only saving grace in this situation is the fact that Wutai Martial Arts Masters are all prideful d… fighters that cannot work in large teams. A group of two or three is pretty much their biggest achievement of teamwork.

We are also lucky that the SOLDIER Director is Lazard. For all that he ‘disappears’ part of the budget on par with the rest of them, us SOLDIERS never have a shortage of pretty much anything. It could have been much worse. Like regular army kind of worse.

I shudder to think that we could have had someone like Scarlet as our Director.

Her ‘genius’ weapons are so terrible it’s not even funny. The rumors about her sleeping through the ranks and blowing the President for budget actually make a lot of sense. I can’t think of anyone I’ve met over my two lives that was so STUPID! Even Fudge had a minimal amount brain cells required to balance between the Dark, Light and Neutral parties while achieving his own goals without being assassinated by any of them.

Meanwhile, Wutai is HORRIBLE!

I repeat and sign that!

I feel like I am never getting the bugs and mud out of my hair. And Sephiroth and I are actually casting Cleaning Charms on an hourly basis! Just imagine the sorry state of just about everyone else who didn’t think to invest in the right Materia.

For all that I am grateful that I no longer have the untameable hereditary Potter disaster on top of my head, the alternative is just as bad. We get constantly bothered for wearing our hair so long that it reaches our knees. Considering that the army is actually _supposed to_ have standards it’s kind of understandable.

But the thing is we CAN’T cut it! AT ALL!

Nothing can damage it. Not steel or laser. Even diamond. Its structure couldn’t even be analysed, much less deciphered!

The Professor was so annoyed that he couldn’t get any samples. It would have made for a very good budget expansion request. The investigation of the synthesis of materials of such strength could be a potential break through. But oh well…

Too bad, so sad…

Seph and I are both very happy about that though, ‘cause I have a feeling that a ‘donation’ of samples of our hair to science would have ended with us being completely bald. And the both of us would rather look like male parodies on Rapunzel over _that_!

Oh!

And we actually had some fun for once.

Met those other mysterious lab victims of Hollander.

Angeal and Genesis.

And here I thought that you couldn’t do worse than our names.

I actually finally remembered why they seemed vaguely familiar. Thank you Professor. For everything. But why the … did you name us after DEMONS!? If I didn’t know what Sefirot was, I would have thought that some of Sephiroth’s name got lost somewhere along the way and was meant to be Astaroth but half of it was lost in translation. Or maybe it’s supposed to be a poor combination of the two?

Well…

At least we are not named after Biblical events.

That’s so much worse.

And Angeal the angel.

Really?

At least Hojo was somewhat creative.

Imagine being named something like Daemon?

Daemon the Demon…

Yeah, that’s not even funny.

We are already stuck with being the Silver Demons of Wutai.

The only saving grace is that at least it’s not the Boy-Who-Lived-With-Too-Many-Hyphens.

I just have one question, if I had stayed in Magical Britain, would I have been stuck as a ‘Boy’ forever?

Probably.

Knowing those idiots…


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 12

Genesis

Genesis was jealous.

And while he knew that it wasn’t a healthy feeling, he could do nothing about it.

It all started with his childhood.

Well, most issues stem from one’s childhood.

The Rhapsodos household was what you could call ridiculously wealthy. He had all the best toys, all the best games, the most expensive clothes…

But the one thing little Genesis didn’t have was friends.

Other children avoided him.

It wasn’t even his fault most of the time.

It’s just every time he was among a group of little kids, they would subconsciously shy away from him. The adults didn’t seem to notice anything. They just thought he was one of those quite ones who preferred his own company. He didn’t. But how were they supposed to know if every time they went to check on the kids, the little ones would all be playing except for little Genesis who would have his nose buried in a book?

Yeah…

So he was on his way to grow up to be Gaia’s first bitter sociopathic bookworm.

Until that day…

When he met his angel.

His parents were overprotective. Very overprotective. For all their money, they couldn’t buy health. There were very good reasons Genesis was and always would be the only child of the Rhapsodos family after all. 

He wasn’t allowed to go out without guards. His ‘friends’ were carefully handpicked by his parents from the children of their wealthy associates to be appropriate company for their heir. He couldn’t just take of his shoes and run through the grass. Or climb a Banora White to chew on some dumbapples while hanging upside down from a branch like the other boys.

For…

“Genesis, you could have been hurt!”

“There may be sharp stones in the grass!”

“OR snakes!”

“The dumbapples, did you wash them?”

“Genesis, look at your knees!”

“You resemble a little piglet!”

“Where did you find that much mud?”

“Your clothes! Oh, look what you have done to your clothes! They were a part of this season’s Summer Collection!”

“Genesis, such behavior and mannerisms are inappropriate for someone of your social standing!”

“We have the money to buy you all the dumbapples you can eat. Don’t do it again.”

But none of those heartfelt speeches ever had any effect.

So that night, Genesis once again quietly slipped out through his window, tiptoed down the roof, crawled through the gardens and dived over the fence from a nearby tree. After all, the security system was meant to keep people out, not lock the residents in.

He successfully made it to his beloved Banora trees. Oh, those sweet dumbapples were waiting there just for him. He could almost feel their succulent juice upon his lips.

Little Genesis took a moment to savor his fantasy. After all, sometimes it’s the process and the anticipation that makes your goal worthwhile…

…Those sweet drops on his tongue, that firm skin in his hands, that flesh beneath his lips…

(…Adult Genesis took a pause there. His recollection seemed to be very kinky. He didn’t even know that his mind was in the gutter even at that age. But then again, it’s probably the memory of the first meeting with his angel that’s having such an influence…)

…He couldn’t resist making his fantasy reality any longer (the both of them for adult Genesis) and made his way up to his favorite tree. After all, it had the most comfortable branches, the best grip, the sweetest dumbapples…

He climbed up like a little monkey. How can others say it’s hard, when it is so EASY?! He is just as human as the rest of them (little did he know). Why are the other boys always out of breath when they reach the top?

…But just as he was nestling onto his favorite branch and reaching for his first treat, he heard something unexpected…

CRUNCH

And that’s when he realized that his hands were only holding air.

From the sudden shock he tried to reach for another branch. But his body had other ideas.

That night it had decided that it has two left feet.

When he completely lost his grip, Genesis was resigned to his fate. A hard fall from the tallest branch at best, some broken bones at worst….

He was so grounded!

But instead of the hard impact he was expecting, he landed on something soft.

Something warm…

Something human…

Oops…

 _That_ must have hurt.

But Genesis is of the kind of people that are terrible at apologies.

But just as he lifted his head to give his unwilling savior a scathing dressing-down after which he would be sure to run in the other direction, he looked into his eyes. And while he couldn’t tell the color, they were the kindest eyes he had ever seen. In that moment he could swear that he saw an angel.

An angel that was hurt!

So instead of the entire speech he had planned on, what slipped out of his mouth was completely different.

“Are you okay?...”

The angel thought for a moment…

“…Y…”

But what he was going to say would forever be a mystery, as the abused tree gave another creek. And all the dumbapples rained down on them.

“Ouch…”

So that’s how two little boys of a very different social standing ended up giggling and crunching on as many of the dumbapples that they could get their little hands on while hugging beneath the tree.

That night, none of them wanted to leave.

They both felt as if they found the other half of their soul that had been missing since forever. Now that constant buzz of a connection in their minds was finally at piece.

And honestly, none of them was looking forward to explaining the origin of their bruises to their parents.

So that’s how a beautiful friendship was born.

And no matter how against a ‘penniless Hewley’ the Rhapsodos family was, neither of them cared.

But now those silver-haired twins are being friendly with HIS other half! And while he can also feel that buzz of a connection between the four of them, he will not stand for it!

Those twins have always have each other after all.

He will not stand by and allow them to steal HIS angel!


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 13

Sephiroth

Meeting someone like them was a nice surprise.

(Although the Professor called everyone besides them failures).

While Angeal didn’t have the soft, comforting hum of his twin, his Adrian, his presence was still a pleasant buzz somewhere on the peripheral.

He was tolerable as a conversationalist as well, even if employing quite simple language and having too much focus on honor. While honor is good and all, he would rather prefer being alive along with his beloved twin in his arms.

They both knew that there was something wrong with both Angeal and Genesis. And while the Professor is a nutcase, his professional opinion is most likely correct. But even so, both of them would like to get to know others like them.

Sephiroth knew that while his and Adrian’s genes were used to create SOLDIERS, as S-cells were a deviation from J-cells that could actually be assimilated by humans to some extent, the cells of Angeal and Genesis proved unsuitable. Oh how angry Hollander was when he found out. After all, with this unauthorized experiment he wanted to shove Hojo from the pedestal as the Director of the Science Department.

And it failed.

Oh well…so sad, too bad, as his twin would say.

At least both Angeal and Genesis actually got ‘normal’ childhoods unlike them. Hollander couldn’t raise them in the labs if he wanted to keep his actions a secret…

In that moment his trail of thoughts was interrupted in the most bizarre way possible.

Somewhere from the side there was an angry screech and a flash of red. Had Sephiroth had worse reflexes, he would have most likely ended up with a black eye.

The next few minutes were…strange?

Trying to pin down a fuming redhead was most definitely a new experience…

But the less said about it the better.

But Adrian had never got the memo, so the next week was spent dealing with some good-natured ribbing from his twin about ‘starting early’ and ‘liking older men’ (whatever that’s supposed to mean)…

And that was how the Silver Demons of Wutai met the Crimson Commander and his personal Angel.

And while for the most part humans were insignificant glitches on his radar, that pair did leave a lasting impression and had later even turned into the first beings they could cautiously call friends.

But that feeling was mutual.

The freaks must keep together, after all.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 14

Angeal

Angeal barely resisted the urge to face-palm.

Honestly.

He has no words.

There is only one explanation for this mess.

Genesis…

That one name says it all.

It is hard to imagine that someone so seemingly engrossed in LOVELESS is so confrontational, but he is. Beneath that beautiful-but-aloof exterior hides a firecracker that only needs a single spark.

Angeal is still surprised just how many people fall for the ‘LOVELESS is the words of the Goddess’ bullshit. How many just write his friend off as a self-absorbed but violent book-worm when that couldn’t be further from the truth. But then again, no one besides him actually manage to get through the tough walls Genesis had built around his real personality.

But as a front a LOVELESS obsession is irreplaceable.

It serves both as a shield from nuisances that run off as soon as they hear some lines, rightfully thinking themselves brushed off and a reason to get some action in more ways than one. After all, it only takes one negative remark about LOVELESS to give Genesis a valid reason to get into a fight as there is no better way to defend its honour…

Not that he approves…

The less that could be said about Angeal’s opinion on Genesis’s confrontational habits the better.

But if that is a vital something that makes his best friend happy, then he will tolerate some excess fighting. It’s the very least that his duty of a good friend dictates he must do.

And if something inside gives a satisfies purr every time he sees the redhead’s smile, then that is something no one else needs to know.

But now that the redheaded menace is rolling on the ground with _Sephiroth_ , Angeal feels like his friend had bitten off far more than he could chew. And that maybe losing this brawl would take him down a peg or two.

O _h Goddess_ he really needs it.

Because fighting over LOVELESS is one thing, but jumping people unprovoked, especially their assigned superior is completely another. Genesis sure is going to have to get far more familiar with cooking than seeing those all those dumb shows on his PHS. Because he is going to be stuck on kitchen duty for the foreseeable future.

At least he will be getting an unforgettable experience.

Might even teach him some common sense.

However likely _that_ is.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 15

Someone, Somewhere

He didn’t know what was going on.

He didn’t ask for this.

He doesn’t deserve this.

For all the people that could have received a second chance, he would have never made even the very bottom of that extensive list. When people thought of his name, they thought of an era long past. Of power and corruption. Of death and ruin. He could honestly say that not a single person could say a good word about him.

After all, there was one very good reason for him being afraid to die. Although he knew death intimately like a lover, courted it, was touched by it, was both chased and sought it, brought its cold embrace to many others, cheated it, stole from it and even faked it, he couldn’t bring himself to expect his inevitable end. That one day it would be HIS turn to join the Lifestream.

He was scared.

Somewhere deep inside…

That there wouldn’t be single person to shed a sincere tear at his funeral.

That there never were. And there never would be.

That those he genuinely loves, would give his life for would follow him into the grave. And other than them the few people he cared for would not even know to come.

After all, for them he was long dead anyway.

But perhaps all those long years spent running and hiding was just a painful, unsuccessful attempt at preventing the inevitable…

But now instead of becoming one with the Lifestream and finally getting a break, he has to do it all again.

If this is going to be the greatest gift or the greatest curse still remains to be seen.

Somewhere, a little boy snuggled deeper into his blankets, while another stayed a silent sentinel watching his master sleep.

And all was well.

For now.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 16

Harry

Those two are hilarious.

No, honestly. They are the funniest thing out here.

It basically takes Sephiroth to say a word and Genesis answers with twenty. They argue like an old married couple. Seriously.

No wonder those weird stalkery fan clubs we all have going on are pairing them up.

Although that’s probably why both of them hate their own fans with such conviction. Their reactions to finding out that they are apparently secretly dating or enjoying casual hate-sex were so in sync, they were unforgettable. I am so _not_ selling those photos.

Though I don’t know if Sephiroth’s habit of holding his feelings in is a good thing. However, I certainly wouldn’t want his reaction to every shocking little thing to be something like that of Genesis. Honestly, throwing Fireballs at people is not cool. And while playing ‘dodge Fireball’ as both the target and the instigator _can_ be fun, I prefer to having our personal belongings intact, thank-you-very-much. And not singed around the edges.

I would think ‘medium rare’ is supposed to relate to food, but I guess I was wrong.

You do learn something new every single day.

And we have learned quite a lot.

For all these years deployed in Wutai is something none of us are likely to forget. Our cosy group of four did gain quite a terrifying reputation for ourselves. For the better or the worse…

But now that we are called back, we are confused.

What the hell are those idiots thinking?

Are they seriously considering that we will now be content doing paperwork? Seriously?

Or that SOLDIER would suddenly turn into Shinra’s personal task-force like the Turks? That is definitely not going to work.

But then I can understand their reasoning. They don’t need four Generals at the front lines anymore. Honorable and skillful fighting is most likely a thing of the past. They have made their point. They’ve crushed the spirit of the warriors of Wutai.

Now it’s time for wide-range weaponry and the regular army.

Another ‘lovely’ piece of news is the fact that both Angeal and Genesis have been transferred to Hojo. Apparently Hollander is busy with something else. The SOLDIER program is now entirely in the Professor’s jurisdiction.

The less said about the ‘enthusiasm’ of all those lucky ones to be passed over into his tender mercies, the better.

Oh well, I guess it’s time to turn a new page in our book.

Midgard, here we come.

Get ready.

I hope that when we are done with this chapter of our lives, you will still be standing. (Who are you kidding, of course not!)


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 17

Harry

Rufus Shinra was strange.

At first glance he was nothing special. And on the second. And on the third.

And for those that didn’t know how, or more accurately _where_ to look, Rufus Shinra was a splitting image of Draco Malfoy at his worst. Spoiled, rich and entitled. A perfect example of the word ‘brat’.

He seemed like one to take advantage of the world at his feet, one born with a silver spoon in his mouth, one that has never been told the word ‘no’. He even had pet goons.

But that was where the similarity ended.

After all, no one would be stupid enough to compare the Turks with the moronic example of inbreeding that were the latest heirs of the families Crabbe and Goyle. Or think that the sophisticated puzzle that screamed danger would throw a fit and squeal in a whiny voice ‘My father will hear about this!’ It is far more likely that anyone who dares to even _bother_ his sensibilities would be quick to disappear even without the issue of orders.

The obsessive devotion that shone in the eyes of the Turks made them all the more dangerous. It wasn’t as mundane as them following orders. Or them being loyal dogs at the feet on their master that must only say to jump before they ask how high.

No.

That wasn’t a good description of their relationship.

Mostly because Rufus wouldn’t have to speak an order. Because by the time the thought would appear in his mind, it would already be done.

No. Loyal dogs licking their master’s feet was a poor description.

A pack of wolves would suit better.

But what made the relationship all the more striking was that it was mutual.

But even that was a superficial opinion.

Because in his eyes, in those light blue orbs lay something deeply broken. They were not eyes of a spoiled child. Of a rich heir that never lifted anything heavier than a book.

No.

They were eyes of someone who lost.

Loves ones, battles, everything…

Someone who fought wars.

Someone who tried.

And failed.

And got up only to try again.

Someone who, while getting everything back cannot believe their luck. And so would hold their newly reclaimed treasure close to their chest. Guarding it like a nesting dragon.

But those eyes were familiar.

They were something I have seen before.

Perhaps because they are the very eyes I see everyday in the mirror.

We didn’t speak.

We didn’t need to.

We didn’t need something as mundane as speech to understand each other.

_You are like me._

_I am like you._

_We are alike._

_Don’t get in my way._

_Don’t cross me._

_I have my treasures._

_I have my own._

_We have different goals._

_We have nothing to fight over._

_For now._

Not a word was spoken.

But an entire conversation was held.

Two carnivores silently divided the hunting grounds and outlined their prey.

For despite appearances Rufus Shinra is nothing like Draco Malfoy.

The only thing they have in common in their hair color after all.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 18

Rufus

Rufus could say that he was taken by surprise.

And that was when he thought he had experienced everything.

He can rarely be surprised these days, but he will cherish the feeling. Although whether the surprise is good or bad he will decide at a later date.

When he awoke in the past in his childhood body, he was initially shocked.

How could he not be?

For all that he had seen miracles firsthand, had been partial to the monster that was JENOVA, to the tragedy that was Sephiroth, the train wreck that was SOLDIER and the miracle that was Aerith, he had never expected something like that to happen to _him_.

What had he done to deserve _it_ , deserve _this_?

Or maybe it is what he _hadn’t_ done?

Because for all that he was a heartless monster, even he had a conscience. How could he ruin someone’s else’s life? (Ok, he could and had done that before…), but that person didn’t deserve it. Didn’t _need_ that kind of stigma. Because they deserved so much _more_ than they got.

He couldn’t take away what little naïve belief in the good of people that person had left.

Their innocence.

They deserved better.

Much better than a monster for a half-brother and the association with a name that made people spit through their teeth.

At least to himself he can admit that there were times when he was close…

When he wanted to tell him. To reveal everything.

Especially when he lost Tseng.

Oh Tseng.

…I never did get to tell you the truth. You lived for me. You died for me. You stayed with me. You held me together and were my rock and my only comfort when the word was falling apart. And because of my foolishness, because of my stupid belief that a master can take what they want but must never stoop so low as to declare their feelings for their servant I never will. You died in my arms and I didn’t, _couldn’t_ tell you…

But just because everything seemed to be over, all the hardships conquered and the world at piece didn’t mean that old enemies suddenly forgot their grudges. That was wishful thinking on my part. A miscalculation. A misconception. A mistake.

And for that I am sorry.

When you had died, all I wanted to do was curl around your body and follow. But I couldn’t do that. You didn’t just sacrifice yourself for _that._ I could never look into your eyes on the other side if I abandoned _our family_. Because that’s what the Turks were to the both of us. _Family._

So I faked my death.

And hid.

And looked after them all.

But that wasn’t enough.

Because none of them were you.

There were times when I almost broke down. Almost wrote that letter.

Because for my want for a connection, something that could possibly not replace the raw wound in place of ours, but perhaps build over it, cover up the pain, act as a surrogate, I was _almost_ that selfish.

But Cloud, just because I didn’t tell you, didn’t mean that I didn’t care.

For you might have been powerful enough to defeat Sephiroth, but when it comes to people, you are clueless.

How someone so innocent survived to your age continuously baffles me. And how none of your so-called ‘friends’ robbed you blind or left you dead in a ditch somewhere I would never know. After all none of them were ever picky in their methods to achieve their goals.

But I failed.

For all that the Turks followed you and played your keepers, it wasn’t enough.

I had completely failed as a big brother.

Again.

And now with your disappearance the world is crumbling down. It’s tearing at the edges. I feel that we will soon cease to be.

I know that you loved this world. For all the pain and hardships that it brought you, you never prayed for its demise.

But I am not you. I am not a Hero. I cannot save worlds. I can only watch as they crumble around us, just like everybody else.

And for that, I am sorry.

But what I am more regretful of is keeping silent. Just like I never called Tseng lover to his face, I will now never get to tell you the truth.

In these final moments I have understood that I kept silent because I was selfish. Because I was a coward. Afraid to be rejected and not because I was protecting anyone at all.

More so yourself, Cloud Strife, my unacknowledged little brother.

But now looking into the eyes of my love, those beautiful brown eyes upon the face of not quite a child and not yet a teenager, I promised myself that whatever happens, I will fight for those connections to my last drop of blood. I will have Tseng. And I will have you to call my brother.

As for that quivering ball of blubber that calls himself my father?

Well, when have any of us cared about what he thinks?

He is only a step stone to MY throne after all.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 19

Cloud

I am so done.

No _seriously_!

I AM DONE!

Those bigots have honestly crossed the last line.

Trying to hurt me is one thing. For I am made from tougher stuff than to bend to nameless trash like them. But hurting Ma is a completely different thing.

And now that she came home with a bruise across her cheek in the form of a hand-print, they have broken the last straw. We are leaving. Right now.

If only Ma would agree and see it that way.

But she doesn’t.

Well, she sees.

But she prefers to turn a blind eye. Present the other cheek. No matter what arguments I come up with, she refuses to leave this shitty town.

But now I am done.

So done.

And fuming.

I am gonna walk through that door, grab her by the hand and leave this place even if I have to drag her kicking and screaming.

But when I did enter our house, the sight that met me was something I definitely didn’t expect.

Because if there was one person in the world I didn’t ever even _think_ to see here, it was him.

In his pristine white suit, with a Turk at each side, he looked so out of place in our run-down home.

And stranger still, was the recognition that shone in those cruel eyes.

Maybe that’s what made me open my mouth.

“Rufus?...”

He smirked.

And I knew, he _knew_

Because so did I.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 20 

Rufus

I looked into those wide blue eyes, those shining orbs, and felt like an unbearable weight dropped from my shoulders.

_He knows._

_This is my Cloud._

_The one who fought Sephiroth and won._

_The one who saved the world._

_The one who suffered._

_The one who disappeared._

But while a weight dropped, it was immediately replaced by another. For while _this_ Cloud is not a naïve child, is not a clueless civilian, does that mean that there are others like us out there? I have already seen proof that things are different this time around, but I didn’t think on the implications.

Does this mean that we have to go through the same cycle again? Or are things different because _we_ have changed things? Or because someone _else_ has changed things?

Are we even in the past or is this some parallel reality?

But then again, for now I have other concerns, such as the terrified woman cowering in the corner. For she is catatonic with worry about what she _thinks_ is happening.

What on Gaia am I supposed to do in this situation? Because for all the many skills my Turks possess, they only have one technique of calming hysterical civilians and that tends to be a little _permanent_ …

I don’t think Cloud would appreciate _that_ …

So I started the conversation with the most cliché phrase possible…

“Cloud, we need to talk.”

He looked at me like he was reconsidering my mental capacity.

“Ya think???!”

I gave him a helpless smile, and shrugged my shoulders.

“In private.”

That’s when the hysterical little thing in the corner gained her bearings, and I finally understood where Cloud had inherited his hardheadedness from.

“Cloud, honey, do you know this man?!”

Cloud looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here.

“Ma…It’s kind of complicated…”

I decided to cut off the conversation before he has the chance to dig himself an even bigger hole than he already has. But then again maybe I shouldn’t have done that by dropping the conversational equivalent of a bomb.

“Actually, it is quite simple. After all, why should I _not_ know my little brother?”

“LITTLE BROTHER?!” That little Chocobo really has a set of lungs on him.

“Half-brother.” I helpfully supplied.

“Ma, is there anything _else_ you _forgot_ to tell me?!”

The little woman has the decency to look uncomfortable.

“No?”

“You aren’t even gonna deny it!?”

“Um…no?”

“How the F… did that HAPPEN?!!!”

“Language you man! I sure HAVE taught you better!”

“Sorry Ma! Won’t do it again!” Cloud looks like he is back with the Cadets, lined up in front of their superior for being busted with their alcohol stash. “But still, how?!” he is just as persistent as I remember.

“Well Cloud, honey, you see when a man and a woman…”

“MA! Don’t give me the Talk!” Cloud looks absolutely _mortified_. I discretely signal my Turks. This blackmail material is _priceless_. It’s gonna go down through the ages! 

“Well what else am I meant to tell you? The fact that I was heavily intoxicated and can’t remember a thing? That you were a product of bad the decisions in my youth? Really?”

“But I don’t want to be stuck in the same group as all those poor sods from Midgard! That if you don’t know who your father is, it’s probably the President!”

“Well, though luck, you are!”

“Now that that conversation is over and done with, I will state what I am here for.”

“What?” Cloud’s eyes shine with suspicion. He only just starts to realize that I am not the kind of person to show up in his house personally just to drop that kind of fact onto him.

“You are coming back to Midgard with me. Pack your things, we are leaving in an hour.”

“WHAT?! I am not going! Who says I am going to go anywhere with _you_? And I don’t want to be a SOLDIER, or a Turk!”

“Really? I can recall a time when you were of a different opinion. Well, never mind, those were not your options anyway. I need a new secretary.”

“A SECRETARY?!”

“Yes. A secretary.”

“But I can’t be a secretary. I don’t even have any formal education. There are probably thousands of qualified professionals lining up to be your secretary. And I don’t want to be a secretary! I will go crazy behind a desk!”

“Well, tough luck. Because that’s what you are going to be. At least I can be certain that you aren’t going to be selling company secrets, ignoring the paperwork by letting it breed upon my desk, trying to get into my bed or painting your nails at work. Honestly, not having to worry about the things on that list would be a huge improvement because at this point I am beginning to think that no amount of brain bleach can scrub the image of overinflated silicon breasts and the smell of nail polish remover from my mind.”

“But, but... wouldn’t everyone else be surprised? That you have an underage, under-qualified secretary?”

“Believe me, you aren’t going to be even a blip on anyone’s radar. Young, blonde and incompetent isn’t going to surprise anybody. Trust me.”

“Did you just call me STUPID?!”


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 21

Rufus 

It was easy enough to say ‘Cloud you are going to Midgard’. However, when it came to actually making it happen I was faced with more difficulties than I had expected.

To begin with, while Cloud was easy enough to convince, as he was definitely not on-board with living in backwater Nibelheim for the rest of his life, his mother was a completely different matter. Considering that she had the actually truthful idea that any illegitimate offspring of _that man_ that became too noticeable tended to disappear, I could understand her lack of desire to leave.

But then again, it was just Cloud I was moving to Midgard. His mother could have a lovely little house in the equally backwater Gongaga if she is so attracted to living in the middle of nowhere.

Regardless of Cloud’s parentage, he would be safe in Midgard as long as he doesn’t start running his mouth, waving around paternity tests or demanding long overdue child-support payments. After all, Lazard is still alive. Cloud’s paternity would be just another of those ‘open secrets’ among the Shinra staff (and thus the rest of Gaia’s population) but his mother is a completely different matter. That woman is too confrontational for her own good.

As to why I would chose to patronize one of my illegitimate half-siblings…

Well, that would be chalked up to another one of my tantrums. A silent protest against my father instead of a direct confrontation that would be a chosen strategy of some people I know (cough, Genesis, cough)…

Another issue is the Science Department.

You have to be blind, death and stupid not to notice Cloud’s obvious _Otherness_ after all (split pupils, duh). Hojo and his ‘associates’ are many things, but _stupid_ isn’t one of them.

Forging and filling paperwork to make it out that Cloud was a result of one of Professor Gast’s experiments was difficult enough. Obtaining the President’s own signature for that paperwork was a masterpiece of deviousness and forgery. And a nightmare of conspiracies.

It began with a blank piece of paper stuck to one of his official documents that required his signature coated with something special directly beneath his would-be signature with Scarlet bribed into serving as a distraction and then creating the paperwork around that one signature.

So now there is proof that while Hojo was busy with Project S, Gast was authorized to run a Project on the President’s _own son_. The project was deemed successful but incomplete as while Subject C shows a great similarities to the subjects of Project S and is superior to those of Project G, the subject had never received Mako treatments. Even if the President would try to deny this, everyone would just assume it to be another one of Shinra’s cover-ups.

To _try_ to disappear Cloud would just be asking for trouble.

And just to be safe, no one had ever said anything about me playing fair.

Blackmail is a Turk’s best weapon after all.

And so now Cloud is sitting across from me in my own apartment.

His new position as my secretary awaits.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 22

Cloud

“So ‘little brother’ huh? Were you ever going to tell me?”

Rufus diverted his eyes. His face expression said it all.

“You wouldn’t have, would you? What I am surprised by is that you chose to introduce yourself to a Cloud Strife that could have just as easily have been an ignorant child. What I want to know is why. You never do anything without an underlying reason”

“Cloud, a blood tie between us was the very last thing you needed. Shinra was gone leaving too many vengeful enemies. I didn’t fake my death just because I wanted to. After Tseng was killed in a hit meant for me, I thought about many things. Our family ties was one of those. It was my choice to keep silent. Perhaps I chose wrong.”

“What I want to know is how long have you known. I now realize that such a thing could have never been overlooked in the medical exams during my application.”

“It wasn’t. But with the SOLDIER Director Lazard being another of the President’s illegitimate offspring who knew _exactly_ what such a status entailed, he buried that paperwork to where it would never see the day. And it hadn’t. One of my Turks accidentally found it when looking into the origins of the SOLDIER program after Kadaj. Before that, I knew nothing. As for introducing myself in this time… I had promised myself that I would look after you and I thought I could protect you.”

While I felt that he was truthful, unconditionally trusting Rufus would be a mistake. It’s more likely that he decided obtain my help with the mess that would happen in our future. The only thing I am surprised about is his personal approach. He always seemed like someone prone to acts of subtle manipulation. But then again perhaps our ‘miraculous’ blood relation isn’t just brought up because of excess sentimentality.

“So… What’s the plan?”

Rufus didn’t bother with anymore niceties.

“So you know that since the twins are now back in Midgard…”

In that moment I felt very confused.

“Wait a moment. What are you talking about? What twins? Are you talking about Reno and Rude? They are not twins, are they?”

Rufus looked at me as if I had grown an extra head.

“Well Cloud, you may have not realized but some things have slight differences. You know, situations that didn’t happen or happened differently, subtle character changes, an extra person that pops up… you know those kinds of things. Just don’t panic…”

Is it just me or is he treating me like I am mentally impaired?

“Could you please get to the point? What twins?”

He looked as if he was about to address the giant Zolom in the room. The one you have to be a blind idiot not to notice.

“The Silver Twins. The Demons of Wutai? The twins you would actually know about had you actually read a single piece of news!”

“WHAT?!!!...”

I guess that blind idiot was me. Figures that the only time I give up on Shinra dirt rags is when they actually print something useful for a change…

“Honestly Cloud! Did you live under a rock?”

“NO!”

“Well I guess Nibelheim _is_ backwater, but I had never realized just how bad it is. How did you even get to Shinra in the first place?”

I could feel my face heating up. How am I supposed to admit that the only reason I didn’t know anything was through my own personal preference? As someone who thrives in the center of a web of a variety of information, Rufus would just think that I am an idiot…

“Ehmm…”


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 23

Rufus

“So you are saying that there are now TWO OF THEM?!!!” going by Cloud’s screeching, he seemed to be genuinely distraught. But then again I wasn’t much better when I first received the ‘good news’.

“Yes.” Calm and steady, you are the voice of reason… _not_.

“Are you serious?! Why didn’t you do anything?! Why did this even happen? Sephiroth was bad enough on his own…” Cloud looked like a terrified toddler waiting for his parents to say that the boogieman from under the bed is just a figment of imagination. But I could do nothing there. Not only is this monster very much real, but he has somehow cloned himself. As if the triplets weren’t bad enough the first time around…

“Cloud, you must understand that Project S has always been kept under wraps. Until Hojo presented his ‘accomplishments’ there was no information to be found, and it wasn’t for the lack of trying either. By the time I found out about the new ‘addition’ it was already too late to do anything. Eliminating Hojo wouldn’t have done a thing. For all that the members of AVALANCHE considered Professor Gast as close to saint as possible due to Aerith’s paternity, he was just as bad if not worse. He just hid it better.

The truth is that there were too many interested parties. Especially since the Project presented valid results. The twins were basically raised in some top secret isolated facility none of my Turks had any success in locating. And it wasn’t as if they were an issue back then. I had other priorities”

I felt like I was making excuses. And I was. I can honestly admit (to myself only) that when I came to in my childhood body, I was too busy strengthening existing bridges with _my_ Turks. Especially one of them. Oh Tseng was such an adorable cutie back then. My own child’s body was the only thing that kept me from feeling like a pedophile. And if now my bed is never empty or cold at night? I think some slacking off is worth it and justified.

“Priorities? What _other_ priorities can there be?!!! Your carelessness could have easily doomed the Planet! How could you be so _selfish_?!” He honestly looked like he was about to explode. Like an angry Chocobo chick that fluffs out its feathers.

“Well I am sorry! ( _Not_ ) I was never one of those ‘Lets sacrifice the pleasures of life for the Greater Good morons’! As far as I am concerned Greater Good can go hang, until it actually becomes a legitimate issue. And it’s not like I had any authority over anything back in the day. I was still in the ‘it’s a talking monkey’ stage of my development! And most of my loyal Turks were still in their ‘chibi talking furniture’ stage. And it’s not like you have any right to be pointing fingers, Mr ‘Let’s stick our heads in the sand, because if I don’t read any news it means that the events around me aren’t happening’!”

“Take that back!”

“Cloud, you are at heart a true Chocobo. Admit it.”

“Am not!”

“You are.”

It was in that moment that Cloud’s lower lip started to tremble and his huge blue eyes began tearing up. If this is what younger sibling manipulation technique is supposed to be like, I am doomed. My only hope is that he isn’t doing it consciously. If not, well… No wonder Sephiroth didn’t stand a chance. My baby brother should really wear a warning sign.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas people


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 24

Zack

Zack felt like skipping through the corridors. Regardless of the possible disciplinary consequences for a lowly Cadet promoted to Third Class. Considering that he _passed_ , he _got in_ , he was over the moon at the moment. Nothing could bring him down.

Although unlike most of the successful cadets, he wasn’t about to drink himself into an elevated stupor. After all, he had a girlfriend! A girlfriend he _had to_ share the news with! And whatever some might say or think, a simple PHS call would not be enough. And if he was being honest, regardless of his easy-going extroverted personality, he would much rather spend this moment of pure bliss with someone dear to him. Because while he may like parties and had made loads of friends among the SOLDIER hopefuls, Aerith’s company was what he truly wished for.

So when he caught the train to below the Plate and slipped in through the doors of Aerith’s Church to sneakily wrap his arms around her, his actions were met with a delighted giggle. Although as he told her of his latest triumph, he couldn’t rid himself of the feeling that _somehow_ , she already knew.

But one thing he certainly didn’t foresee were the consequences of him bailing on the Third Class SOLDIER party at the Honeybee Inn. Because his absence had basically labelled him a social outcast among those that did not know him. And sadly, among those that _did_ , among his fellow Cadet friends, only Kunsel was promoted to Third. Nobody else. But even if Zack got to choose again, he would rather chance social suicide over hurting Aerith. If that now meant that his equipment would go ‘miraculously’ missing or his designated room was while being the only one without a roommate, made up for such a ‘luxury’ by being an ex-storage cabinet located next to the lavatory! And now, as a certified expert, Zack can tell anyone that being woken up at three o’clock in the bloody morning just because some inconsiderate idiot decided to take a piss and flush the toilet _three times_ is _not_ fun. _At all_!

But the physical bullying was an all-time low he certainly didn’t expect.

Although when Angeal ran into him the first and only time it happened, Zack didn’t clarify the misunderstanding that it was not an ongoing issue ( _yet_ ). And _yes_ , while he did _try_ to be an honest person, even he couldn’t resist the temptation of his favorite hero’s and role model’s offer of mentorship. Even if it was made out of misguided feelings of duty and honor in an attempt to offer protection to a bullied baby Third.

And if Zack was a bit overexcited and eager to be mentored by Angeal, well… he kind of _was_ … Although being nicknamed the Puppy by _Genesis_ of all people was a bit too ~~accurate~~ much. He wasn’t even _that_ bad! _Really_!


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 25

Angeal didn’t understand why his friends were looking at him like he was one of Hojo’s latest ‘successes’ mixed into the Cadet ‘welcome’ mystery stew. Genesis had an obvious twitch to his eye and Adrian looked about to face-palm. The only relatively normal one was Sephiroth and that was probably only because he was sleeping facedown on the table.

He had obviously messed up _somewhere_. But he honestly couldn’t remember where.

“What?” If you don’t know what you did wrong, always act innocent. It annoys people.

In that moment, he could swear that if Genesis had a Fire-Materia on-hand, they would get another complaint for extensive property damage filed to Lazard. Not that it ever mattered. Especially considering the height of the stack of that collection no one ever reads. What can he say? It’s Protocol… unfortunately. Or fortunately… considering that Lazard, being his very own conniving self used them as a way to get an increase to the SOLDIER budget.

“What is _that_?!” Genesis should really see a doctor for that eye. Because that twitch cannot be natural.

“Oh, that’s Zack!”

“Well, who the fuck is _Zack_?!”

In that moment, while one blue-eyed brunette was pretending to be a chameleon and blend in with the nearest wall, Adrian had the indecency to snicker.

“ _What?!”_

“You do realize that you two are acting like an old married couple? Maybe it’s time for some therapy? Or marriage counselling? You can even cash in on the benefits they have going for the Shinra employees. Or the SOLDIERS. Though the first would likely make your love-life public property by the end of the day and the other is more for the PTSD kind. Although for you two, every day together ends with trauma so it’s not like you will be able to tell the difference.”

Angeal could feel his eye twitch. While he may be less trigger-happy than his best friend, even his patience had its limits. Honestly, being the supposed ‘sane’ one among the group of obviously psychotic SOLDIER Firsts had many benefits. Getting all the latest gossip and blackmail because he is considered the more approachable as well as dumb (who even had the gall to spread _that_ around?). Dumb enough to be considered ‘safe’. Which was a mistake. Because even if the Ocean is seemingly calm, it hardly means that it won’t change its mind in the next instant and offer a painful death in its watery depths.

But as with all things, such a cover also had a negative side. A negative side that hardly allowed him to vent his feelings. After all, a hissy fit over being piled with paperwork was allowed for Genesis. Even burning it and throwing it out the nearest window. Eventually leading to the minimal amounts being sent to the temperamental redhead. Because everyone knew that sending paperwork to Genesis was alike feeding the Midgar Zolom. It will definitely be a success but you will never get anything out of it.

So he was the one that had to deal with the increased workload. Because Sephiroth mailed most of his paperwork to Science quoting that as that is the department officially responsible for his health _including_ mental, their secretaries can be the ones to deal with insignificant hindrances that pose an obstacle to his stellar performance as a SOLDIER. So basically, posed as a socially-retarded meat-head with a low IQ. And he would eat the mystery Wednesday stew if Adrian wasn’t the one who gave his twin the idea.

Although Adrian’s way of dealing with paperwork was rather ingenious in itself. Oh, it always got done. But no one had ever seen him writing. _Ever_! One of the company conspiracy theories that Angeal himself kind of believes in, is that Adrian has a clone whose entire purpose is to fill his paperwork in some abstract, Top Secret location or he was born into a set of triplets, not twins. The reason he supports such stupid ideas in the first place, is that all the paperwork is always done in a perfect replica of Adrian’s Chocobo-scratch! And that kind of shitty handwriting would have _never_ been copied by one of the Shinra secretaries had they been assigned to do his peer’s paperwork! Even for secrecy’s sake! Because any trained secretary would have cried upon seeing it. And those that later have to read (or decipher) it definitely _do_!

Adrian’s atrocious writing is actually part of the reason for another popular conspiracy theory. That _Hojo_ is the twins’ father (although Sephiroth’s beautiful cursive leaves many in doubt). Because the only other person that brings the secretaries to tears (and pretty much every other person that has the misfortune to have to deal with the man) is the Head of Science.

Many of those conspiracy theories were actually the reason for many drunk bets among the Turks. But no matter what methods they used to spy on Adrian, they _never_ caught him doing paperwork. And when Angeal used the opportunity of having access to the drunk twins to ask, the little shit mumbled something about _QUILS_!!!

So for those reasons, Angeal is stuck being the only SOLDIER First that actually _does his fucking paperwork_!!! Because Genesis burns it. The lazy Science secretaries recommend filing it to Hojo (which no sane person ever does). And Adrian’s, while always complete, was virtually impossible to read, rendering it next to useless.

Although being the odd ( ~~supposedly~~ outwardly normal) one out in a room of crazies had its perks.

Getting blackmail pics of Genesis and Sephiroth hung-over _together_ on the same couch and the bird’s nests their perfect hair turned into that morning, then posting those to the Silver Elite and never being suspected, was certainly one of them. After all, Adrian doing something like that, is so much more believable…

So now that he has decided to mentor a baby Third, everyone will only think that he is being nice. Being friendly. Not that he took a personal trainee to finally have a legitimate ~~excuse~~ reason ( _training and gaining experience_ ) to heap that Shiva blasted paperwork onto _somebody else!!!_

And stop being the only official idiot among the SOLDIER Firsts that _still_ hadn’t found a way of getting out of doing it!


End file.
